Maybe we are the change!

It was an easy break by all means. There was no slimy producer offering me a couch as the ladder to success, I wasn’t making an entry as a silly moll or as a sexy item number.

It happened like this. I was acting in a period play called “Baghdad ka Ghulam’ directed Barry John. I played Benazir, a woman who dresses as a man in order to reach her lover in the traditional Arabic 18^th century setup. An assistant spotted me and called me to audition for Dibakar Banerjee’s next film.

I auditioned for Dolly and landed the part. I saw her as a vulnerable creature, rebelling but seeking approval from society. One who tried to dignify her drunkenness by fasting on tweesday and thirstday. She is the breadwinner for an ungrateful household that is judgemental of her means to provide the bread. She has her own sense of tacky fashion, wants to speak in angrezi, and wore war paint for make-up. She does other ‘wrong’ things, like drinking and abusing. Dolly was real.

Dolly was appreciated.

What a great cinematic entity I had the opportunity to play for a debut!

 After the film released, Dibakar met me. He warned of the future. “We’ve made you look quite hideous and down-market. Don’t expect much’.

‘Why, I was just ‘playing’ a character’, retorted I.

‘I am glad cuz no other woman in the industry would have the balls to play Dolly, but still’.

I got a worried phone-call from a ‘well-wisher’.

”Kya kiya? Ab to Smita Patil ban ke reh jaogi?” This is a famous casting director.

“So?” asked I. But I understood his concern, in time.

                                                                                                             

Two months on, a lot of the roles I am offered are that of hot-blooded seductresses. I am pleased because it means that Dolly was convincing, but disappointed as I cant risk getting type-cast.

This is a typical tele-interview.

“Your complexion please. Fair?”

“No… I am wheatish...”

“Thank you”

Or

“See, the jawline is sharp. We are making Lara Croft in Tamil. Since you were so hard in the ‘Lucky Oye Lucky By Chance’ you can doing. I not seen yet, but peoples say that serious kind of film. No problem, you only need one song in a waterfall with python and one action sequence”,

“How is this Lara Croft then?”

“No three fourth of the film is flashback to childhood between Lara and her father no?”

Many other producers expect other things, mostly physiological. Like longer hair, fake lashes and nails, whiter teeth and so on. Earlier it compelled me to stare at the mirror, and wonder how I dared to believe until now that I was reasonably good-looking.

Then I discovered that for larger-than-life showbiz, nothing is enough.  34 B should be 36 B, naturally white teeth are passé, hazel coloured lenses will be in perpetual vogue and yes, waist should be slim and skin should glow.

Sadly, most of our leading ladies have given in. Plastic rules the roost. But this is a reflection of what sells, what the audience wants to see.

                                                                                          

There are other filmmakers though, mainstream and not so mainstream, that appreciate ‘real’ beauty and sensuality. Women on screen are becoming real and ‘flawed’, be they in like  sans make-up Shahana Goswami or a formerly plump Konkona Sen or even a drunk and oedemic Kangana Ranaut.

I was present at this years Filmfare Awards ceremony. It was heartening to see encouragement in the form of Awards for films like ‘Oye Lucky Lucky Oye’ and ‘Mumbai Meri Jaan’ in addition to commercial blockbusters. This year has so far been good as well, with films like ‘Dev D’ ‘Luck By Chance’ doing well critically and commercially. More such are waiting in the wings.

May be Obama’s slogan has spread beyond his country’s borders. May be the line between commercial and mainstream is blurring for the better. May be the two will happily co-exist like Ram and Shyam. They are valid in their own right and even necessary for the voice and socio-cultural ethos of the country.

                                           

The choice, truly, is ours. In a general sense what I am saying is- I will drink in a pub with my sisters if I want, express love on Valentine’s Day or any other day with a person of any sex, send pink underwear (I cant use the term chaddi, many still call me that due to my last name), vote, wear a bikini, lock lips on screen. Do what I think is right, although I know that my freedom ends where your nose begins, provided you don’t poke it in my private matters. I am saying till change comes, bend the freakin’ rules.

May be we are the change !

(I had written this piece for WideScreen, sometime in early 2009. Just re-posting)