यहाँ इक खिलौना है
इन्सां की हस्ती
ये बस्ती है मुर्दा-परस्तों की बस्ती
यहाँ पर तो जीवन से है मौत सस्ती
ये दुनिया अगर मिल भी जाए तो क्या है
ये दुनिया अगर मिल भी जाए तो क्या है
Sahir Ludhianvi’s words have rung like a requiem in my ears for days on end in the past month. There has been much chatter about nepotism and too little about what this environment can do to a person’s mental health. All this in the wake of a suicide by a beautiful actor who happened to be an old friend.
It is being said that the industry seems to be divided between ‘insiders’ and ‘outsiders’? In my opinion the Hindi film industry and it’s entire eco-system is only divided between kind and unkind people. The spectrum of unkind begins at mild displeasure, thieving and at it’s worst, at the underbelly-level manifests as a desire for sociopathic retribution. But if one’s lucky, kindness too is expressed in a straightforward manner. Genuine people tend to gravitate towards one another and often make lifelong bonds.
In the brief time that I have spent here as the first person of my lineage, my assessment is that the industry operates like a food chain. People are scoundrels when they know they can get away with it. Those who are anguished today have themselves been cruel to their subordinates. You hate your bully for not being ethical with you, while bullying someone working under you as though it is a rite of passage for them. This is an acceptable MO in this dog-eat-dog world. Not feeling remorse is considered a leadership quality., decency, sensitivity is considered a handicap.
Notwithstanding this environment, we are expected to work without being afflicted or getting drawn into the phantasm. And we must make heartwarming entertainment for we tell stories! Our livelihood depends on being creative and expressing our emotion truthfully. But it is no secret that we ourselves are imperfect, vulnerable and bruise easily as artists. It is a deeply isolating profession, wherein success and failure are both public and bring their share of dilemmas. Ours is a business where personal life is invariably affected by public life. Sometimes, for no real reason, actors dominate national headlines for a disproportionate amount of time.
There are insiders who can be kind and generous, and outsiders who are punitive egomaniacs. In the nascent phase of my career, I was often ‘cut to size’ by outsiders. It took me all my strength to recover from various forms of subtle sabotage. But this is not about me. The tragic part is that everyone here has experienced a version of this.
